Gene-O, my great father-in-law, is a gardener-extraordinaire! He is fairly famous for his flawless gardening. He raises the nicest, roundest, happiest tomotoes you have ever seen. The heads of cabbage are the size of a small spaceship. I could go on and on and on. The best part is–the garden is in our backyard! Nothing like having someone plant it, till it, grow it, harvest it, and then show up at your door saying “Want some?” It’s the greatest set-up you can imagine!
However, this year I have serious concerns about the situation. It seems that Gene-O is having serious flashbacks to last year’s harvest. Let me set the stage. Garden couldn’t get planted as early as normal due to rain. Garden finally got mudded in due to rain. Plants weren’t growing or looking happy due to rain. The normal bumper crop could literally fit on the bumper of an old worn out rusted Toyota truck. Garden was finally tilled back under in the fall after dismal, and I mean dismal, harvest. The crisis? There were no onions. Now, to me that would cause absolutely no problem. See, I’m the type who might use 3 onions per year-TOPS! However, the Turner family eats onions like the average person eats mashed potatoes. If there isn’t a semi-truck of onions going into winter I’m sure they think they will never live to see the Spring.
So, what you see below is just a very, small sample–an itsy, bitsy, teeny, weeny peep-hole view of the garden as it has been planted so far. You are only seeing one single, very long row of onions. Enough to feed 3 football teams. What you aren’t seeing is that there are SEVEN, 7, VII, MORE GOOFY ROWS OF THE DARNED THINGS!
I’m concerned there won’t be tomatoes, peppers, cabbage, all the good stuff I’ve see in the previous years. My palms are sweaty, my vision is blurred, my blood pressure is rising, my hands are shaking. How can a person live on just onions–which is what Gene-O is apparently trying to do? I honestly believe he is still having flashbacks from last year–and needs to talk to a therapist to help work his way through this! Is there help for this type of “situation?” If any of you have any ideas please let me know. There has to be some type of intervention for this condition!!!!
He isn’t called the onion king for nothing!!!!!!!